Today my husband and I move Mary Claire into her sorority house. She is officially a sophomore at the University of Nebraska in Lincoln. After living at home this summer with her three younger brothers and us, she is MORE than ready to jump in feet first with several other Delta Gamma sisters to ready themselves for formal recruitment, taking place next week.  She is excited to experience this part of sorority recruitment and welcome all of the potential new members into their chapter home.

Having my daughter with us all summer was a blessing but now it is time for her to transition back into her college life. Boxes showed up on her attic staircase a few days ago with clothes, toiletries, school supplies and more. The cozy overstuffed chair in her bedroom that I painstakingly cleaned off prior to her arrival in May so she could curl up and “read a good book” is now covered, barely recognizable, with unfolded clothes, shopping sacks, a few pair of boots  (does one need that many boots?) and several other items that I assume are  traveling with her.

I can’t help thinking….we didn’t get it all in…the time went by so quickly. Yet, we did accomplish and share much… late night talks, a few shed tears, some deep laughter, baking cookies, at least twenty batches of the infamous hot Vidalia onion dip (you might want this recipe!), some shopping, mass together, a few days at Gram’s lake cabin, neighborhood walks, a few of her brothers’ baseball games (did I say just a FEW?), cuddling new kittens, volunteering for the International Special Olympic Games held in our home town, several library books…

I remember blogging last August about my daughter’s college start and how heart wrenching it was for both me and my husband. (Honestly, prior to her departure, I do believe it was the only time we both sobbed simultaneously?!) I remember writing that I felt all the color in our home and somehow gone, referencing my daughter’s personality and her love of art which physically has always been strewn here and there in process.  I am grateful for the color that was brought back home this summer (Did I mention she was in charge of decorations for recruitment? Hello paint, glitter, and tissue paper flowers with all the bling!)

Thankfully, this exit is less emotional (thus not so exhausting?), and, while I know I will feel melancholy for a few days after we send her on her way, as a more seasoned parent I have experienced an entire year of the ebb and flow of her presence in our family and it feels more comfortable. As she begins her second year, I hope she is rejuvenated, rested, and settles back into college life feeling loved.  I remember being anxious myself at the start of each semester; nervous, uncertain, vulnerable …Make sure and arm your own daughter with love and courage. Perhaps even write her a letter of encouragement to tuck in her suitcase or to arrive via snail mail that first week of school. If you are a first time college parent, take heart: The journey will get easier as everyone settles in…

It is the Sunday before we move Mary Claire into her college residence hall room and we are all fatigued and emotional. We have made so many runs to Bed Bath and Beyond that I have officially run out of my giant blue and white 20% off coupon postcards that have been sitting dog eared in a folder in the car! Strewn all over the kitchen table are brooms that Mary Claire has painted…one last art project to be experienced by us all with her paint blotches all over  paper grocery sacks and Styrofoam plates. It is a welcome mess and I wonder if all the color will slowly fade from our house once she is gone. I will miss the canvas and the brushes but mostly the colors that exuded from them as they spilled out of Mary Claire’s imagination!  Her Dad and I fall into bed that night exhausted and shed a few tears. I think we are sad because we still remember what it was like the day we brought her home from St. Elizabeth’s 18 years ago.  It is a mixture of melancholy, regret for things left undone or unsaid, loneliness and love. Time has simply flown by…

It is Monday and we are up bright and early loading the car.  MC’s little brothers head to campus with us to help haul box upon box up to her room. Later, Rich takes the boys home and grabs our oldest son now home from football practice. The two of them pick up a purchased Futon and deliver it to the room.  I t feels nice to have Mary Claire’s brother’s involved in this process. They don’t realize how much they will miss her presence in our home. Good thing we live in town b/c we ended up taking three huge boxes of clothes, etc., BACK home.  She had to edit…what on earth do folks do when they drive from miles away? ;-0   Mary Claire is excited but nervous and perhaps lonely as her roommate will not be moving in until the end of the week. She chose to go ‘potluck’ and was assigned a nice young woman from Beatrice NE. Her name is Leah and she is not going through recruitment but is in the honors program with Mary Claire.  I hope they will learn to enjoy one another. And, I also hope Mary Claire rearranges her clothes and things to only occupy HALF of this tiny room?!  Oh my.

Before we said our goodbyes that afternoon, Mary Claire’s recruitment guide stopped in and was an energetic soul with a wonderful sense of humor and a sincere enthusiasm for Greek life.  We learned there are 13 young women on MC”s floor going through recruitment and they will be in a small group together. Their orientation and first meeting is tonight and tomorrow Sorority Recruitment officially begins. We left Mary Claire and knew she was about to experience an incredible week, forging new friendships and growing in her independence.

As I close this entry I want to say a little something about texting.  I have never in the past been a fan and have made it my passion in some of my educational endeavors to encourage young adults and youth to see the importance of face to face and voice to voice communication. Developing interpersonal skills as one matures is key to having healthy relationships. However, I have seen over the past few years as my kids have entered high school that there is a place for this more technically oriented mode of communication. I encourage all parents of teenagers to at least learn the basics of sending and receiving text messages so they can connect with their young adults. (This younger generation has embraced texting as their main form of connecting with one another and often responds to a text much quicker than even a voice mail on their cell phone or an email. I do believe there is no going back!)

I am not planning on hovering over Mary Claire by any means and am a believer in the healthy launching of these incredibly capable young human beings. However, Sunday evening as I turned in for the night, I received a ‘goodnight’ text from Mary Claire.  I imagine she was lonely in that dorm room by herself and being able to connect briefly with her made us both get a better night sleep.   The adventure begins tomorrow…